Life In Austin: Rudeness 101

Well, what a weekend. It had its moments, that's for dang sure.

I'd like to start out by saying that I have no pictures on this version of LIA, but I'm sure some will surface in the coming days.

I'd also like to mention that for the first time since we moved to our new house, Mrs. Austin is pretty happy with our house. With the exception of the kitchen cabinets and maybe the fact that I thumbtack comic artwork up in the computer room, she seems to be nearly at peace with the decor and furnishings of each room; the last piece coming at somewhat of a cost.

The weekend started with the 30th birthday of two friends. One, my brother in law, on April 2nd, the other an ex-coworker on April 3rd. We started the evening at a bar across from the office and proceeded to get really happy until midnight when it was time to wish the 2nd 30th birthday happiness. The next day was spent mowing the Greater Austin Jungle and Wildlife Preserve we have as a backyard. I lost count of how many times the mower died from inching forward into 12-15" high dandelions and morning glories. It's not to say I'm a lazy yard care professional, it's to say I'd rather pull a toenail out with my teeth. Plus, Austin weather times itself to act up during bouts of free time.

When that was done Mrs. Austin got another of her debilitating headaches that require a decent amount of TLC and Rx for her not to go insane, but we had a birthday party to go to. I didn't want her to go, but she said she bought a new outfit and they had come to her party so she was going. I promised not to stay longer than necessary, meaning "We'll leave after the 'Surprise.'" While we're at the party, and it's dark and everyone is quiet, one person who I didn't know sprayed someone else I didn't know with silly string, right in the eye. Accident I'm sure, but the recipient of the blast would not shut up about it. Birthday Boy was on his way in and she kept lippin off about her contact in the loudest possible voice. Hey, lady, it's not your party. Hit the bathroom and shut up will ya?

The next day sent us to the outlet mall to get the finishing piece of furniture for the living room. We went for a chair but got a chaise lounge instead. Yeah, it's kinda pompous, the chaise. It requires a separate purchase of two slaves, a large palm frond fan and a year's supply of grapes.

Anyway, we get to the store, we'll call it Bottery Parn, and find there are no chairs like ours in stock but they have this chaise lounge. Well, there are a couple other people looking at the chaise lounge as well. They're sitting on it, laying on it, looking at it, asking it questions. Mrs. A and I decide we like it and since the price tag is still on it, we grab it and head to the front. While I'm talking to a clerk about what the different prices on the tag are, a guy starts standing next to me listening in and mentions that he'd been looking at that chair but couldn't find anyone to tell him what the tag meant so he didn't pick it up yet. Well, I felt bad for about two seconds, then figured, hey you snooze you lose. I head over to the check out and I can see him shaking his head and leaving the store, apparently a little bent outta shape, so I start feeling a little worse. I figure, if this guy comes back in and says, "I'll give you $50 if you let me buy this chair" I'd let him have it. (It wasn't the one we wanted but from almost $1300 down to $260 I'd have bought a meat grinder.)

But instead, he comes back in and says, "You know, I'd been looking at that chair for about 30 mins trying to find someone to ask about the price tag when you guys took it." To which I said, "Wow dude, that sucks." Then he gets REALLY pissy and storms off saying, "Fine! Keep it!"

Now, two things. It does you no good to get antsy with me when I'm buying something. Until you pay for it, it's not yours. It's not like I stole it from you. We just pulled the trigger faster and now we get to relax in comfort whilst you get to tell your wife (because come on, no guy buys a chaise lounge) that you lost the purchase. And two, who spends 30 minutes looking at one chair? There was only one in there, and it took you 30 minutes to decide? It took us 2 mins to decide, another 2 to ask about the price tag. I'm sorry, but if your brain can't handle decisions faster than an abacus, you don't deserve comfort, you deserve a thorozine milkshake and some bed rest.

For the rest of the day, I'll turn the commentary over to Mrs. Austin.

Thank you Mr. Austin.

After having absconded with the ill-gotten chair, I went to pick up
LMA. It turns out that she'd not been on her best behavior so Chucky
Cheese had to be denied. Instead, I offered to get a movie and dinner
for the family that watched her. We all piled into the car and sped off
to the local grocery store to pick up supplied. As we were standing in
the ice cream aisle (Robert, Schuyler, LMA and myself) the girls decided that an impromptu game of ring-around-the-rosie
was in order. They were cute and a little on the loud side but not in
the house-ape kind of way. Trust me, I'm the LAST person to allow LMA
bad behavior. She doesn't get away with it at home, at a friend's
house, and certainly not in public. I'm not of the mindset that
children should be seen and not heard but I'm a stickler for manners and
can't tolerate much chaotic noise (flashback to me at any family
gathering where I drown out the noise with jack & coke or rum). As we
are trying to figure out which ice cream will have the least amount of
sugar impact on the girls, a woman in her mid-forties walks by and looks
at the girls and then looks at my pregnant belly. She clicks her tongue
at me and says "And to think you are going to have a third. Perfect."
and walks off. It took me a second to figure out that she wasn't being
nice. After I grabbed LMA up in my arms I followed her to the check
out stand and "blessed" her with a dozen children just as wonderful as
mine. She made some comment about never having children like mine and I
walked off. My gallant friend was not so ready to let it go. I didn't
know really what was happening until I walked back down the ice cream
aisle and saw Schuyler standing there pointing at Robert who
was exchanging words with the woman. About five minutes later he walked
back down the aisle and said that we should go as soon as we could. It
turns out that he said some things that she didn't necessarily expect
and she refused to apologize to us. Long story short, she ran from the
store and I'll bet she is careful checking her mail for the next few
weeks.

It's nice to know that there are people out there that still stand up
for other people and sad to know that people think it is alright to take
potshots at pregnant women. Of all the people in the world to be nice
to, I thought pregnant women and children were top of the list. Its
alright though, I'm pretty sure she's not on God's favorite people list
at the moment.