My kid can beat up your kid.

So I often talk with other parents about their kids. It never starts that way though. It always starts with "How was your weekend" or "Did you see this movie" and it always boils down to, "Well MY kid can read sanscrit and she was potty trained at 13 months." Is it vain to talk like that? I'm horribly proud of Rowan, just as my friends are proud of their kid. Even if our or their child ISN'T Mozart or Bobby Fischer, we still marvel at their accomplishments.

But that still doesn't fill the void in long distance calls when all the stories have been exhausted and you're left with "So what have YOU been up to?" You can usually tell the people who really have something to talk about because their conversations lack the retelling of events. What's your job now? Are you doing ok? How's your wife/husband/significant other? Did you get snow? I feel bad for them and I feel bad for myself. Are we at the age when it doesn't matter what we do anymore? Are our children now the masks we wear for the world to see? I can start to understand why little league sports are so big now, if the child does well, people will think well of the parents. That's rather deductive and hardly fair, but emotional attachment and social plays rarely are.

With that in mind I think parents should make a concerted effort to really try to get to know your friends more. I realize you have your hands tied with children, but if you can get a friend to open up to you with some bit of information that has nothing to do with their offspring, it's very likely they will cherish that exchange more and something more concrete can be form out of it. If not, continue to spew facts and data about your sons and daughters and you'll at least create a fan club for them and some possible baby sitters.

I don't want to sound insensitive about this, but sometimes I just feel bad for people that I tell Rowan's accomplishments to, especially those who don't have kids. To them, I might as well be talking about another hobby or ideal or genre of movie they have no desire to be involved in and it's rather alienating. So to be fair, since I can't always control who has kids and who doesn't, why not play to the other side. It's not a good side or bad side, and I don't want them to feel like they are less for not having kids, and that's the point. It's like ruining the movie if you talk about it too much.

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