Miniature Evolution

People may wonder what it's like always writing about one certain thing, one person. I can hear it now in an email from someone surfing in on a whim, "Don't you get tired of constantly recounting such small events? Don't you do anything else in your life?" The answers of course are No and Yes. Both Cheryl and I have plenty to do. A lot of it isn't fun, but it doesn't necessarily involve Rowan either. We have our hobbies and our interests that we do our best to make time for on a daily basis. Sometimes we have time, sometimes we run out. But if you pause for a moment and think about it, wouldln't you want to be there for every advancement your child takes? I was beside myself when she said "wow," her mouth got really small, then really big, then really small again and this soft timbre poured out of it in a gentle little "wow." Rowan has a whispery voice, almost gravely, like she was a womb-smoker, and to think that I'll miss one new word just terrifies me. Have you ever heard a parent tell another parent that their child just said a new word or did a new task or action? The parent that missed out has this tone of voice and change of posture like they missed the only day of sunshine in 200 years.

Let me tell you, it's worth it. I've never played a video game or read a comic or have seen a movie (with one or two exceptions) that make me feel as good as watching Rowan learn something new. It's like a drug, I want her to evolve and evolve exponentially until she's merely a creature of light, barely existing in our plane of reality. In between the crying and the whining and the tantrums are long periods of laughing and giggling and monkey-see-monkey-do. And from one monkey to another, it's just priceless. Right now she can probably say between 10-15 words and understands what they are. A few of them are crystal clear, others a bit mushy. (We know "schle" means "fish" because that's what she says when she points to a fish. I don't think F's are quite picked up yet.)

So it comes as no surprise then that I find myself spending huge amounts of time talking to, tickling and tormenting Rowan. I don't mean torment like hang in the iron maiden and start pulling chains, but I like testing her boundaries, just like she's starting to test ours. I like to see how much poking she can take before she melts down. I like hiding things from her until she either loses interest or starts swinging. It's only fair. She needs to learn that the world is not about her and when she pushes my envelope, I'm right there to push back. I need to know what I can expect from her as a person, that's how we learn to relate. Some may think I'm mean, but I've got her best interests at heart with most every action I take and I'll pit that against anyone who says they're a good parent but don't know what makes their kids mad.

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